Everyone makes mistakes. But only a fool keeps repeating the same ones. 

It’s not that we make mistakes that matters but what we do about them.

Mistakes can either break us or build us; block our progress or advance it.

What kind of life do you want in the New Year, more of the same or something better? 

If you want something better, lose the ego and use mistakes as constructive feedback for a better life. Better yet, learn from the mistakes of others to minimize pain and accelerate success.  

We gain knowledge, wisdom, and experience through mistakes and become more capable of navigating our path. 

Here are six tips for harnessing the power of your mistakes to help unlock your best life in 2023. 

Don’t Blame…Own Your Mistakes

Until you admit you made a mistake, you will repeat it until you finally learn from it, which some people never do because they’re more afraid of appearing wrong or disappointing people. 

A mistake holds you in its grip until you admit you made it. So take your power back by acknowledging it and use it as a stepping stone to greater success and fulfillment.

You’re a student of life who’s growing and discovering.

Don’t blame, make excuses, or justify. 

And don’t worry about what other people think or their disapproval, or being criticized or judged, which they’ll do anyway, if not over this, then over something else. 

Live your life!

By admitting you made a mistake, you’re holding yourself accountable. And you will have peace of mind, greater self-respect, and your peers’ respect.

Shift Your Outlook

Thomas Edison shifted his perspective to viewing mistakes and failures as necessary stepping stones to success. 

For him, mistakes were lessons, and he kept using that feedback to adjust course until he finally got to where he wanted to go. 

That’s the mindset of successful people. 

Some mistakes are simple errors; others are life-altering (not necessarily the “good” way). Either way, for better or for worse, there’s always something valuable to learn. 

Ask, “What’s Next?” 

Once you’ve admitted the mistake and know why it happened and how to avoid repeating it, it’s time to move on and ask, “What’s next? How can I make something good come out of this?” 

You made a mistake. There’s no changing it. 

Use it to make your life better in some way; don’t waste it. 

Stop Dwelling on It

Although you should admit your mistake, dwelling on the past gets you nowhere, so handle it and move on.

Staying stuck in the past and overthinking things fills you with self-doubt, and kills confidence and self-esteem, making you even more anxious and mistake-prone. 

Take charge of your mind and mental focus. Don’t let your negative self-talk gain momentum. 

Be kind and empathetic to yourself just like you would for a dear friend. No good comes from beating yourself up. 

Make peace with your mistakes. 

Remind yourself that life goes on.

For a brighter, better future, learn from your past so you don’t repeat the mistake . 

Create Your Plan of Action

Next, make a plan of action of what you’ll do differently to make things better moving forward starting today.

After analyzing the data and making your plan of action, put your plan into motion. An imperfect plan that hobbles forward is better than a perfect plan standing still going no where. 

Create a vivid mental image of what you will and won’t do from this day forward based on what you’ve learned from the mistake. 

If you have to get new skills and resources, get them; stack the odds in your favor. Have the will to act as you take steps to unlock your best life.

Make Some New Mistakes

If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not growing. 

But try not to make mistakes that ruin your life. 

People who are afraid of making mistakes usually live life too small, miss opportunities, and make even more mistakes than if they lived with passion, purpose, and power because they’re too cautious and always second-guessing themselves.

Make the most of your mistakes and then make some more! Keep experimenting and learning. Let your life be a bold and daring adventure! Embrace that outlook to minimize the toll your mistakes take on your mental and emotional health. 

Be Solution-Focused

The next time you make a mistake, be solution-focused instead of dwelling on the past and beating yourself up. 

Don’t ever let a mistake keep you from living your life or pursuing your dreams. 

Take ownership of your actions AND embrace an optimistic outlook.

Try to focus more on making something good come from your past and creating new opportunities instead of on what you’ve lost. Use these tips to work through your mistakes for a better life now and a brighter future in 2023 and beyond. 

Image by John Hain from Pixabay

The post 7 Tips For Making The Most Of Your Mistakes appeared first on Lifestyle.

Failure is one of the easiest sources of opportunity we miss.  

We look so long and hard at obstacles and what we lost that we fail to see the opportunities failure creates.

We achieve more when we reframe failure as “feedback” because it shifts our focus from obstacles and loss to new methods and opportunities.

Psychologists claim one reason failure creates opportunity is that it aids in our personal growth. Failure can make us stronger, wiser, and more resilient.

Every “failure” is a learning experience from which we may grow.

Failure can expand our understanding and change our mental, emotional, and physical activities for the better, and set us up for greater success.

Failure doesn’t have to be the end; it can be the beginning of something better.

The Ropes of Success

Failure can be nothing more than learning how to succeed at something, like learning how to walk when we’re toddlers.

Failure is a learning experience that improves our mental skills and abilities to overcome obstacles and learn new things; failure reveals what’s missing or how we must adjust.

It improves the planning process, how we analyze data, and what new skills, abilities, and decisions we need moving forward to reach our goals.

The feedback we get from failure lets us know when our plans don’t make sense, are unrealistic, or unobtainable with our current resources or how we’re using them.

Failure can improve our ability to create a progressive, comprehensive plan for greater success next time around.

Like it or not, the ability to analyze data and information and make decisions that make reaching our goals more feasible is enhanced when we fail if we choose to see the good side of failure. Failure teaches us how to evaluate information carefully and decide what data applies to our situation.  

Without failure, we wouldn’t have the opportunity to make new and exciting discoveries and improve old inventions (e.g., the light bulb, the automobile, rockets) or even the opportunity to solve problems and find solutions.

Emotional Opportunity

Failure can be a double-edged sword if we’re not careful. Letting failure “rule” the day can damage self-confidence and create a negative mindset. It’s easy to personalize failure until it becomes our new identity. Some people believe that they fail in reaching their goals because they’re a failure as a person. That’s both sad and a lie! No matter how many times you fail, you are NOT a failure!

If you let it, failure will help you grow and become better and even teach you how to manage your emotions more effectively. Failure can lead to self-forgiveness, even greater confidence, and deeper appreciation and gratitude.

Forgiving yourself for failing is a powerful way to finally free yourself from anger, sadness, shame, regret, and guilt. Forgiving yourself can be a process for reestablishing inner peace. It also strengthens confidence because you acknowledge that you’ve overcome setbacks, survived failure, and have intentionally decided to move forward with purpose. Sometimes the fresh start you need is the one only you can give yourself.

Gratitude increases, too. Gratitude plays an important role both as an emotion and a skill because it strengthens resilience, refocuses a negative outlook, and builds inner strength. Failure is an opportunity to choose to practice gratitude regardless of our circumstances and challenges.

Get Back In the Saddle

When you get thrown off the horse, you can quit or get back in the saddle and keep going. Failure is a chance to change your strategies, tactics, approach, beliefs, or actions so you can make the necessary adjustments that pull you closer to your goal or dream.

It requires you to take responsibility and be in charge of what happened, control your emotions and how you will respond, and stay on purpose.

One of the most humbling things about failure, if you’re going to learn and grow from it, is that it makes you take responsibility for your actions and role in the situation. You don’t blame, justify or make excuses because that gets you nowhere. Taking responsibility paves the way for you to take inspired action to correct the problems and issues. By not blaming others or avoiding consequences, you make the feedback serve you and support your goals.

Failure is an opportunity to adjust your approach and take laser-focused and purposeful action, which allows you to make necessary course corrections and limit future setbacks. Failure reveals what doesn’t work, what you need to do better, and where to focus. It’s the opportunity to go back to the drawing board to make better plans and decisions that get you closer to what you want to do or achieve.

Failure isn’t the end of the world. It’s a chance to make discoveries, learn, grow, tweak, adjust, and change. It provides an opportunity to plan, analyze data, and make decisions. Failure paves the way for personal growth through increased confidence, gratitude, and self-forgiveness.  

How you deal with failure determines how successful you’ll be. When you reframe failure from “messing up” to “helpful feedback,” you empower yourself to take positive, productive action. Some might even say that success isn’t even possible without tests, trials, and failures. 

The post How Failure Creates Opportunities appeared first on Lifestyle.

So what if every other person on the planet doesn’t believe in you? Is it essential to your happiness and success? No! Would it be nice? Yes!

Defeating self-doubt begins with YOU believing in YOU! And guess what, if you don’t believe in yourself, nobody else will either.

You were born with everything you need to experience love, joy, and success in life. It’s your life. So be happy living it because it’s your life to live and cherish. So, consider these great reasons for why you should believe in yourself.

• You Deserve to Pursue Happiness – Regardless of who you are, gender, skin color, or religion, you deserve to pursue happiness and success just as much as any other human being on the planet. It’s your choice, privilege, and right to feel good about yourself and be grateful for your life. You deserve the opportunity to create the kind of life that ignites you every morning, regardless of your circumstances and upbringing or what people think or say about you. You have the power to rise above your setbacks and challenges and live a fulfilling life. 
• Your Relationships – Look at the relationships that add happiness to your life. You have friends and family that are supportive and believe in you, who are rooting for you and want you to succeed. If they knew you were struggling with thoughts and feelings of self-doubt, they’d give you a million reasons why you should believe in yourself and start living the life you want and imagine.
• Your Current Situation – Even if you’re struggling right now and have suffered a setback or two, you’re still here. You’ve made it this far! So, you’re doing something right. You got up today, and are reading this right now, which means there’s hope! Please focus on the things you’ve gotten right and have done well. Choose to believe in yourself. 
• Previous Success – Maybe you’ve not been successful at everything, but you’ve been successful with some things, probably many things. Did you go to school? That’s a success. Did you get up this morning? Have you made someone smile? Did you succeed with a project or dream? You have had successes in certain areas of your life. You have more reasons to believe in yourself than to doubt yourself.  
• You’re NOT Inferior or Less Than! – You’re not better or worse than anyone else on the planet. You’re equal, and you’re just as worthy, good, and deserving as anyone else. Got it? Good! You deserve the life you dream of living if you’re willing to take inspired action to create it because no one is going to hand it to you; that’s not how life works. No one deserves it more than you do…but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to work for it. You have to earn it. It’s your life. And you don’t need anyone’s approval or permission to live it the way you want to live it. 

It’s time to rise from the ashes of self-doubt and believe in yourself once-and-for-all. Despite where you’ve been and have gone through, regardless of any bad choices you’ve made that left your life in shambles emotionally, relationally, or financially, it’s time to rise. And “rising” begins with believing in yourself. Believing in yourself is a choice. And it’s a choice that only you can make, so why not make it right now?

In Part Four, we’ll cover how to overcome negative thoughts. But until then, believe in yourself. Stay tuned. 

The post Part 3: Defeating Self-Doubt, Reasons to Believe in Yourself appeared first on Lifestyle.

How much does fear rule your life? Is it turning you into a person you don’t like? Is it an unwanted companion you wish would go away?

Here are five common fears and tips for dealing with them.

1. You let what people think of you affect how you live

It’s nice to feel accepted… to belong. But when you compromise who you are to fit in and be accepted, something needs to change.

Never let the fear of rejection shape your desires or the kind of person you want to become.

Settling for a life that isn’t truly yours is settling for life in prison.

Never let people control how you act, think, or live. Sure, they have an influence – but not a controlling influence. Living a life of reaction isn’t living at all.

Your life is YOURS to live.

So decide what YOU want! Stop making unhealthy compromises just to fit in or be accepted. Don’t change who you just to keep “love” or certain people in your life.

Decide what you want and don’t want. Set realistic, achievable goals. And take action because “action” is an effective strategy for escaping fear’s grip.

2. You keep your thoughts and desires to yourself

The fear of criticism is as powerful as the fear of rejection. You might think that if they really knew how you thought or felt – if they knew the REAL you – they might not like you. So what? Is pretending to be something you’re not and sacrificing your happiness really worth it?

The thing is, people can tell when you’re holding back, leading them not to trust you or wondering if you’re being deceptive.

Give yourself the gift of being honest. It might take courage at first but peace of mind and heart, along with self-respect, are worth the risk.

Respect your ideas enough to share them because your thoughts, feelings, and desires are just as important as anyone else’s.

3. You resist trying new things

The fear of failure keeps us from taking chances and risks – even well-calculated ones.

This type of fear shows up as putting things off, sabotage, panic, and anxiety attacks.

The fear of failure is crippling. It undermines our abilities and confidence. We start believing things like, “I’m not good enough,” or “I’m not worthy,” or “I’ll never be as good as they are.”

If this sounds like you, find some inspiring quotes that give you the courage to move forward; keep them where you can see them all the time, like on a mirror or the refrigerator, to be reminded often of how amazing you are. As you take action, your self-confidence will grow, and your life will improve little by little.

4. You avoid doing the right thing

Fear makes people do things they know are wrong. It can also keep them from doing what they know is right by either saying nothing or doing nothing.

Are you afraid of offending someone, being punished, judged, rejected, ostracized, or of retaliation?

When forced to choose between right and wrong, remember your principles and what you believe.

Decide to stand up for what’s right.

If you need some courage to do the right thing, write on a piece of paper, all the things fear will cost you or others if you stand idly by and do nothing. Then, burn it up and move forward bravely.

5. You settle for less than you want or deserve

You settle for a career that’s just “okay,” or a safe but passionless relationship or you settle for “average” health that’s just a few pounds overweight.

You fool yourself into believing that it isn’t really that bad. “It could be worse,” you think… at least you’re safe and know what to expect.

You get one life. Never settle; it doesn’t do you or anyone else any good. Settling snuffs out hope. Want a dull, boring, numb life? Settle. Settling kills enthusiasm, hope, passion, and creativity.

Want to stop settling? Start taking risks, even small ones. You deserve to live life on YOUR terms; if you’re not trying, you’re not living. And if you’re settling, you’re not free either.

Stop worrying about disappointing people, and start living and dreaming of a brighter, more passionate tomorrow.

Different Types of Fears Holding You Back

Fear is a thief waiting to steal your joy and everything you hold dear to your heart. Here’ a common list of fears we all struggle with from time time:

• Fear of the unknown
• Fear of making a mistake
• Fear of criticism
• Fear of failure
• Fear of abandonment
• Fear of not being popular

Overcoming Your Fears

Below are some helpful tips for transforming fear from something that holds you back into something that propels you forward:

• Examine your values
• Believe in yourself
• Spend time in reflection and meditation
• Practice living in the moment and not in the past or the future
• Keep a journal
• Seek divine guidance
• Realize that you’re not alone
• Take an action every day that reinforces the best version of yourself
• Embrace a little bit of uncertainty in your life
• Be true to yourself no matter

This holiday season, give yourself the gift of courage and start living YOUR life.

Image by analogicus from Pixabay

The post The Gift of Fearlessness appeared first on Lifestyle.

It’s easy to conclude that life’s out to get us whenever we don’t get what we want.

We blame God, or the universe, whenever we don’t win competitions, fail exams, or don’t get the thing we spent all day and night praying for.

Blaming God can be an understandable reaction, but it’s disempowering.

There’s a better way to handle this situation besides blaming God or wallowing in self-pity because life isn’t fair. Read on, and we’ll tell you what it is.

Be Content with What You Have

Have you ever considered that when things aren’t going your way, maybe it’s just life teaching you a lesson about contentment?

Many people think the key to happiness is getting what they want, whether it’s a car, a promotion, expensive clothes, or a million dollars.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting those things, but it raises the question: are we really going to be happy once we get them?

The answer is no. Why? Because how can we be happy with those things if we’re not content with what we already have?

People who are content with what they have don’t stress themselves with what’s “lacking” in their lives.

They focus on what they have, not on what they don’t have.

They live each day with gratitude and don’t throw a fit when things don’t go their way. They simply move on with their lives, knowing that something better is on its way.

Take Some Time to Reflect on Things

Instead of pointing fingers, wouldn’t it be so much better if we reflected on why things didn’t work out?

Sure, that’s difficult to do when emotions are running high, but it’s an excellent way of handling drawbacks because it turns “failure” into a learning moment.

Taking time to reflect on the events that transpired allows you to set your emotions aside for a more objective perspective.

It also keeps you from lashing out at people or feeling jealous or envious.

How we choose to deal with failure and rejection reveals the type of person we are…it shows our character. Besides, we learn more from failure and rejection than from success.

By reverse-engineering “failure” and reflecting on things, you can identify problem areas two work on and change.

Using this process spares you from the guilt, anger, and misery that often comes from personalizing failure. It’s one thing to “fail” but another thing to consider yourself a failure. It creates a venue for healthy conversations with yourself and enables you to focus more on solutions than on being denied what you wanted to have or achieve.

Rise From the Fall

A “no” doesn’t always mean no. Getting rejected the first time doesn’t mean you’ll get the same answer after your second attempt.

If you still feel like going after what you want after spending time in reflection, grab the opportunity the next time it presents itself.

Work on any problem areas you identified to increase your chances of getting a “yes” on the second try. If the second attempt doesn’t work out for you, learn from it, then try again.

Know what you want, work hard to get it, but be kind to yourself when life decides not to give it to you.

Practice the habit of looking for lessons in each setback – like an athlete studying game film. Maybe life is trying to teach you something. You’ll repeat the situation until you learn and grow from it.

You deserve to be happy; life is yours for the taking! So, don’t give up! Persevere. Endure. Believe. And have faith that you are becoming the kind of person who can create the type of life that makes you happy.

Image by eko pramono from Pixabay

The post What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way appeared first on Lifestyle.